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« fortune cookie | /words/ | it was sunny when I woke up »

May 27, 2004 08:25 PM

Street corner ransoms

I just had a randomly timed, deep and meaningful exchange. It surprises me when things like that happen. My plan was just to say hi, and be nice, but it ended up as a really extended discussion about all the Things. You know, sometimes I plan so hard, I try so much, I want things to happen in the Right Way in the Perfect Moment that I plan myself to death. I think I just need to let go some of the time and let things flow in a more natural way.

There's lots of discussion about upheaval and doing things in ways that are different to my normal, understood patterns. My first gut/raw reaction to them is *eek*, but then I start to assimilate the thoughts and plans, and consider that change is perhaps the path that is most similar; that the unexpected is what I want to embrace. That just because one way works doesn't mean that another won't.

Is this what my saturn return is all about? I know there's 1,000,000 other things about becoming an adult, and what that entails, but I sense that as I grow older still that I somehow lose pre-conceived notions. It seems like I'm doing things backwards to socitey's norm, but so naturally to me. Is it possible that I'm actually understanding myself more, and that lets me be free to walk an unexpected path and free to make mistakes along the way, without judgment?

I open my arms to the world, and I welcome it.




ps: I'm pretty sure this is the most beautiful girl in the world: